A Change of Plans

Hi,

Well some of you might know that we had to change our plans for this week. We were supposed to fly to Dallas on Wednesday night for our appointments on Thursday. Well on Monday I started feeling kind of sick. By Tuesday evening I had a fever of 103, a horrible cough, snotty nose, plugged up ears, and a very sore throat. It was pretty obvious that I was not going to be well enough to work a full day on Wednesday and then fly, so we decided that we would cancel our appointments. I woke up Wednesday with a fever of 101 and felt like my head was going to explode. I called the clinic and cancelled our appointments. I was disappointed, but I felt so sick that I just didn't care. The thought of flying was not a pleasant one. Making the decision not to go turned out to be a very good idea. For those of you wondering, I woke up with a fever of 101 again today and made an appointment with my doctor. It turns out I probably have an upper respiratory infection and a sinus infection, maybe even bronchitis. I've been given all sorts of medications to take. Hopefully they'll work and I'll feel better by next Friday when we fly to Florida for our cruise.. At this point the cruise is the most important thing. I've been planning this for a year so I need to be better!

You all might be thinking, "Oh man, I'm so sorry, that really sucks you had to cancel." Well let me just tell you that me being sick was not the only thing that happened this week. Yesterday, while I was sitting in bed trying to rest, my phone buzzed. I picked it up and saw that I had an email from the donor agency. Instead of telling you what the email said, I'll let you all read it:

Tonya-
I wanted to talk to you in person but don't have your phone number with me at home.

I know you are supposed to go to the clinic this week.

The donor is not cooperating and has asked for more $$$

We don't allow any donor to negotiate compensation so she has decided to go with another agency that will compensate her $8000 in Chicago.

We tried to reason with her, etc. but to no avail.  This is horrible news and we are just devastated.  I felt it was best to just tell you exactly what happened and I told Tomisina at the clinic also.  I would have preferred to tell you in person via phone.

You know what I did after I read that email?? I laughed. Probably not the reaction you would expect, maybe it was the fever messing with my brain, but I laughed. I sat there and thought to myself that this email was kind of ironic. While lying in bed on Tuesday, burning up with a fever, I asked Ryan if he thought me being sick was a sign, that maybe we shouldn't be going. When that email came through I decided that it was a very good thing that we didn't go.

I did eventually cry a little, but not as much as you would expect. I think I'm still just too sick to worry about it. I do know that this means we have to start all over again and I just don't want to think about it. I'll take denial for another couple of weeks. I need this cruise more than anything now. I need to go have fun, relax, rest, and enjoy my family and friends.

I want you all to know that both Ryan and I are doing ok. In my last blog I talked about how great 2012 is going to be. Even though it hasn't had the kind of start I hoped it would, I still think it's going to be great. I believe God has a plan. This will all work out the way it is supposed to. We are just starting our journey.

Stay tuned

~Tonya

A New Year

Hi Everyone! Happy New Year!

2012! I think this is going to be a good year. It just sounds like a good number, well at least it does to me.

For those of you wondering about the news thing, here's the update. They haven't forgotten about me, but it's local news. I've been in contact with the reporter and she is still interested in doing a story on us, it's just hard because other stories come up that need to be reported. Hopefully it will work out soon.

Now, on to the fun stuff! January is going to be a busy month. We have our first appointment with the clinic that we chose in Dallas on the 12th. I have to go in because the Dr. needs to get a "feel for my uterus". I'm not totally sure what that means, but it sounds like a blast, don't ya think? I know you're all jealous. Flying to another state to get naked from the waist down and into stirrups is definitely my definition of fun! Ha. Oh the joys of infertility. Anyway, I'm assuming that after that appointment we will have a better idea of the schedule of things to come. We plan on starting our first cycle of IVF in February, as long as the timing all works out. I'll give you all more information on that after my appointment next week.

The next exciting thing in January is the cruise and my 30th Birthday! Now this I am super excited for! I've been planning this cruise for a long time, so I'm thrilled that it's almost here. A week of relaxing on a beautiful ship and on the beach in the Caribbean is just what I need to prepare my body for what's to come. I hope to come back relaxed and refreshed, ready to start the baby making process.

Here's to a great 2012! Stay tuned!

~Tonya