I've started a blog!

Caution: In order to talk about infertility I can't be shy or reserved. If you are at all uncomfortable with the idea of reading about my Dr. appointments and all the details then stop reading now. Otherwise be prepared to know things about me that you never thought you would! :)


I've decided to start blogging about our infertility journey. So much has happened since we found out we are infertile and unfortunately it is just the beginning. I'm sure some people are wondering, "what exactly is wrong with you? Why can't you have a baby?" I know infertility is a broad diagnosis but I assure you we know exactly what is wrong with my body. In short, I am an old lady! Lol. I laugh because for a long time I have said that I was just an old lady in a younger body. I have a hard time staying up late, I have aches and pains and I'm sure there are other things that I can't think of right now that made me say that. It was always a joke between Ryan and I. Well imagine our surprise when that turned out to be true.

I have diminished ovarian reserve that will turn into premature ovarian failure. A little history of how we got to this diagnosis.

Ryan and I started trying to have a baby in about July of 2009. By November of 2010 I just had a feeling that something wasn't right. They say that if you don't get pregnant within a year of trying then you should see a Dr. So on November 22, 2010 we went for our first appointment with the Reproductive Endocrinologist. We didn't leave there feeling very positive. Did you know that if you are young and healthy and do not get pregnant after a year of trying, then your chances of conceiving naturally drop to 5%. I know right?!?! It's crazy! The Dr. told us the first thing that needed to be checked was my ovaries. One the third day of my period, which just happened to be November 27, the Saturday after Thanksgiving, I went in for a vaginal ultrasound. Ryan was out of town on a boys camping trip so my mom went with me. Sitting in that cold room undressed from the waist down with that ugly robe wrapped around me, I was so nervous. And boy was I totally unprepared for what I was going to find out that day!

When the Dr. was doing the unltrasound he said, "Hm, I can't seem to see your ovaries. This looks like what I see when I'm looking at a menopausal women." WHAT!!! Now I'm no Dr. but I knew that this could not be good. The last time I checked women go into menopause when they are old. I was only 28! I mean, I guess I was closer to 29, but still! I can't be menopausal.  And what does that actually mean?!?! He then went on to explain that normal women my age should have any where from 10 to 20 antral follicles on each ovary. The number of antral follicles is a good indicator of how many eggs a women has left. Someone my age should have alot of eggs. So I'm sure you're dying to know what my number was, right? Well I had ONE follicle on each very small ovary. Now the old lady comment is starting to make sense right? I knew that wasn't good, but I still didn't fully understand what it meant. Well after some research on my own and then confirmation from the Dr. at our appointment for our test results we were given the bad news. He said if we want to have a baby we will need to either adopt or do In Vitro Fertilization using a donor egg. Yep! You read that right. If I want to actually experience pregnancy, which I very much do, I will have to use an egg from some other woman. Talk about one hell of a shocking diagnosis. So there you have it, the story of how we found out we are infertile.

There is so much more I could say but I'm going to end it here. The point is that this is a very serious and upsetting situation for us. What makes it worse is the absolute lack of support for people struggling with infertility. Insurance covers nothing for us. We are looking at costs up to $30k to do donor egg IVF and there is no guarantee that we will even get pregnant! I don't know about you, but we do not have that kind of money laying around. So I'm going to be pretty damn vocal about all of this. I have nothing to be ashamed of!

Stay tuned for more in the Neufeld vs Infertility battle!
Tonya